I'm starting to receive photographs from the amazing Akif Hakan Celebi.
We had a shoot a couple weeks ago, and I was anxiously waiting for the outcome of our shoot. A good 19GB worth (!) of photos were taken that day, and he had told me I had done a good job.
And here they are.
I was lost for words when I first saw how the shots came out. I have been a fan of his work for some time now. And now here I was, becoming a part of his work. As weird as it seemed, I also felt very fulfilled and proud. And at the same time, I feel as if the girl in the photograph isn't me. The reason why I've been a fan of Akif's work is how he depicts girl in their own environment (=bedroom, specifically) and element, yet filters their "world" through his filter and creates a entirely new "world". When looking at the photographs, it almost feels as if the girls are luring you into their words, as if they are inviting you to be a part of their world. In some photos, the girls look so apathetic, so disconnected; yet, they speak so strongly to their audience.
And here I am.
Experiencing the role of the "girl" in the photograph, inside her element, safely inside her "world". And when people see it, what do they think? What do they feel? Do they get to have a "glimpse" of me, just like when I look at the other girls?
In a sense, I almost feel like I'm not the girl in this photograph.